Brave
by RavenclawReality
Summary: "In that instance Neville knew, just knew, that that was the last time he would deny his own courage."


Neville had to struggle to keep his chest out and his head held high as he climbed the steps leading away from the Hogwarts dungeons. _Breathe, Neville,_ the voice in his head shouted to him. _Walk confidently, do not run. Don't let them see you sweat. Don't let them see you cry._

"Neville!"

He turned at the sound of his name to find Seamus Finnegan, and the warmth seemed to return to his body immediately at the sight of a friend.

"Are you okay?" Seamus went on, "What was detention with the Carrows like? They didn't torture you did they?"

"Just one Cruccio to show me who was boss, and they ranted about rebellion and the almighty Dark Lord and the Muggle genicide they're planning, blah blah blah, but after that it was just sitting."

"Still, it sounds brutal."

"You could take it," said Neville. "I'm still here, aren't I?" Just as he started walking away, he had one last thought. "Wait, Seamus, what day is it?"

"Saturday," said Seamus, looking confused. "Why?"

"Seriously? The bastards kept me overnight."

Seamus just nodded. "Yeah. Luna was saying how at midnight it stopped being detention and started being imprisonment, but I thought-"

"Luna? Is she here?" Asked Neville frantically, his eyes lighting up just at the mention.

"Oh yeah, you missed it, she got back. Said she was trapped in Malfoy's basement."

"Oh thank Merlin she's- wait, Malfoy's baseme... But it doesn't matter because she's safe, right? I just can't believe... Where is she? She's here, right?"

Seamus just laughed. "Breathe, mate. Yeah, she's here. I think she said she wanted to take a walk or something, just look for her outside."

He didn't even have a chance to finish the sentence before Neville was on his way out. "'Kay thanks, Seamus," he called over his shoulder before disappearing around a corner.

Neville couldn't believe it. He felt a sensation like swallowing hot tea after coming in from the cold, a burning hot flow sliding down his throat when he mouthed her name, spreading and warming his entire body. After a winter of biting cold and nights that dragged out for too long- a winter of cruelty and a loop of call-and-response torture and rebellion that accomplished no change- the sun was finally coming out.

For loneliness had been different before he knew Luna. Sure, he had been surrounded by people these past few months, but he could never voice how afraid he was. Not with the Carrows and Snape on watch. Not when he was a Gryffindor- a seventh year one at that- and knew he needed to be strong for the rest of the school. Yet he had felt lonelier during that cold, cold winter than he had ever felt before, including the times when her really _was_ alone. Today he could not imagine that anyone knew true loneliness until they felt the lack of _her_ presence.

All of those thoughts immediately stopped eating his mind when he caught the sound of humming; a melody so quiet and gentle that it could only be heard if sought out.

"Luna!" he called, and she called his name, and before he knew it she was all around him, squeezing the air from his lungs and the despair from his mind and twisting and bending around until there was nothing left in her and all she could do was hold him as close as she could. Neville wrapped his arms around her and leaned his head on her shoulder, and for a moment, they just stood in the middle of the Hogwarts corridor, breathing heavily and making up for a winter of fear and uncertainty.

"I'm so glad you're still here," Luna finally said, almost breathed, into Neville's chest. Any other day, this phrase would've been a joke, since Neville was always at Hogwarts during the year. But no one laughed at it today. Today, it had a new weight.

"I'm glad _you're_ here," was all Neville could say back.

Luna let go and looked at Neville for the first time. He had scars the last time they talked, but now he had fresh wounds that clashed with his skin. Luna did not stare at them. "I was about to take a walk," she said, and she said it in such a _Luna_ way, such an ordinary way, that Neville had to smile. "Come with me." Then she did something she had never done before, and reached for his hand. He intertwined his fingers with hers as she led him out into the brand new springtime.

"I heard you were locked up in the Malfoys'", said Neville tentatively. He tried not to imagine what Draco, his evil father, and his father's Death Eater cronies could have done to her, but a few horror scenes slipped into his mind anyway, spreading and tainting everything they touched as a black ink stain would.

"Yes, it was really quite terrible," she sighed, "But they didn't hurt me," she added, seeing the look in Neville's eyes.

He wanted to find out more, but knew by the quivering of her hand that he shouldn't press her for details. "It was really quiet when you were gone, you know," he said instead.

"Sometimes silence can be nice."

"But this wasn't. It was silent because you weren't there, and I tried so hard to fill it the way you usually do, but... the silence was so scary."

The two walked along for a minute, still hand in hand, looping around the Black Lake and listening to the crunches of dead autumn leaves that had spent the winter buried under the snow.

"I think," said Luna, "Maybe it wasn't the silence that scared you, but the fear of what followed."

"No," said Neville, after letting another minute pass in which he thought about Luna's words. "It wasn't that. I was afraid that nothing would follow. That the silence would never end."

"It's going to end, Neville, I promise. It'll end."

"It already has."

And she let go of his hand and put an arm around his back because his shoulders were too high, and he put an arm over her shoulders because she looked chilly, and they walked some more.

"It's springtime now, you know. In nature." Said Luna in a way that made Neville picture the thought flowing from her mind right out her lips without pausing in between.

"Is it, now?" he replied. "How can you tell?"

"Wilden," she said. "He's out now."

"Wilden?"

"It's my name for the Giant Squid."

"Oh."

"You can't see him during the winter. I haven't figured out where he goes yet, but I'm working on it."

Neville laughed and looked over at the lake. "In that case, you're right. I see Wilden's tentacle." He pointed with his free arm.

Luna nodded, and they walked along, completing their circle around the lake and heading back toward Hogwarts.

"I think I can finally start being brave," said Neville after a moment.

"What do you mean?"

"Well now that you're here, you and Ginny and Seamus and Michael are all safe... we could do this. We could hold our ground against them... We could win."

"Yes," she replied, "But I meant about the 'finally' part."

"What?"

"What do you mean that you can _finally_ start being brave? You're always brave."

Neville shook his head. "No. I never was."

"You're a Gryffindor," said Luna.

"I wanted to be a Hufflepuff."

"If you were a Hufflepuff, you'd still be brave."

"No I wouldn't."

"Would."

"How?"

Luna stopped walking and turned to face him. "Neville, have you had a look around school? Have you looked at the news? Have you screamed?"

"Umm, yes?" he said back, puzzled.

Luna looked up at him, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Each day you go on here is a day that you're brave."

And her words filled the apparently spring air, and seemed to weave through the trees and float through the sky.

"I never thought about it that way," was all Neville could say.

And he hugged her once more and on an impulse, kissed her lips, and it felt like the right thing to do. It felt brave.

In that instance Neville knew, just knew, that that was the last time he would deny his own courage.


End file.
